1) stop for a moment; 2) take 3 deep breaths; 3) name what you feel; 4) choose a calm action.
Free printable chart
One page, US Letter, with a box for every step and every day of the week. Put it on the fridge and let your child tick the boxes.
Prefer A4? It prints fine with “fit to page”.
The 4 steps, with a tip for you
- Stop for a momentParent tip: No scolding, just a pause.
- Take 3 deep breathsParent tip: Breathe together.
- Name what you feelParent tip: The child can point or say one word.
- Choose a calm actionParent tip: A hug, water, a book, or a quiet toy.
Make it a quest instead of a reminder
Instead of repeating the instruction, start with a tiny story. In Mess Monsters this routine opens like this: “Bed Lump got upset and wants to feel calm again. Shall we try small steps?”
You stay the game master. Your child does the real step, you confirm it on your phone, and Bed Lump gets a little happier with every step. The phone stays with the adult; the routine happens in the real world.
Run this routine in Mess Monsters
This routine is part of Mess Monsters Premium. The core routines are free. You can also make your own quest by describing the routine in your own words.
